Cloggy,
Second party isn't factored in. You're the mother of a deaf child, hence first party (and second [you] if so chosen), third party is someone who has no direct ties (family member, et al) to a situation. For example, you and husband have a disagreement and can't come to concensus. You go to a counselor who becomes third party. This is the part jillio plays, as outsider looking in (no pun inteded, although I know I'm gonna get called on that remark!).