deaf or hearing friends
- Thread starter Marg18
- Start date
Lantana
New Member
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2003
- Messages
- 400
- Reaction score
- 1
Great subject! I am glad you brought it up.
I probably have an equal number of hearing and deaf friends. 'Because of the communication problems, of course it is more comfortable to be with your own kind -- deaf -- however sometimes deafies do not satisfy my need for intellectual conversation. Deafies tend to be "name droppers" and that bores me to death. "Do you know so and so??" Ugh. And I absolutely hate deafies who correct a person's sign language abilities. We have different dialects, just as hearing folks do, so accept it and keep your lip zipped!
I probably have an equal number of hearing and deaf friends. 'Because of the communication problems, of course it is more comfortable to be with your own kind -- deaf -- however sometimes deafies do not satisfy my need for intellectual conversation. Deafies tend to be "name droppers" and that bores me to death. "Do you know so and so??" Ugh. And I absolutely hate deafies who correct a person's sign language abilities. We have different dialects, just as hearing folks do, so accept it and keep your lip zipped!
- Joined
- Sep 7, 2006
- Messages
- 45,078
- Reaction score
- 335
I notice that I mostly hang out with other deafies like me..who grew up mainstreamed and learning ASL later on or hearies who know sign language.
The reason for this is I find myself having a hard time connecting with deafies who grew up culturally deaf due to them criticizing my signing skills as not being "strong ASL". Got tired of it. I wont hang out with hearies who do not know sign language cuz I am tired of being left out in large group conversations.
The reason for this is I find myself having a hard time connecting with deafies who grew up culturally deaf due to them criticizing my signing skills as not being "strong ASL". Got tired of it. I wont hang out with hearies who do not know sign language cuz I am tired of being left out in large group conversations.
Miss-Delectable
New Member
- Joined
- Apr 18, 2004
- Messages
- 17,164
- Reaction score
- 6
Well, I tend to hang out with more deaf friends than hearing mainly because of the communication factor and that we knew each other from childhood. I do have some hearing friends who can sign, but I do not see them often.
I tend to stay away from hearing who doesn't sign because it tends to be a lot of work, perhaps, I'm lazy but I learned from experience that it's often not satisfactory to have such limited conversations and the like.
As for hanging out with culturally deaf or mainstreamed deafies, it doesn't bother me which as I seem to get on okay with them.
I tend to stay away from hearing who doesn't sign because it tends to be a lot of work, perhaps, I'm lazy but I learned from experience that it's often not satisfactory to have such limited conversations and the like.
As for hanging out with culturally deaf or mainstreamed deafies, it doesn't bother me which as I seem to get on okay with them.
Very interesting. Well I am hearing, just met a Deaf person a few months ago. As some have said here it is tiresome writing back and forth. The communication is limited. Jokes are no longer funny. Who you are as a person is lost because you cannot be yourself to the fullest. This is why I started learning ASL and practiced hard and studied a lot and learned about 1,000 signs in 7 weeks. Right now I hang out with my Deaf friends (who I have only known for a few months) more than my hearing friends. But my hearing friends I see just as much as I did prior to meeting any Deafies. My new friends just message me all the time to go do this or that or just hang out. I see them weekly. My signing has greatly improved because of that. I enjoy my new friends a lot and I know if I still did not know sign I wouldn’t be friends with almost all of them. I don’t think because they wouldn’t want to but because in social settings, party, club, or just hangin out watching a movie who wants to write everything down???? I know I sure don’t!!
Hear Again
New Member
- Joined
- Jan 21, 2005
- Messages
- 20,114
- Reaction score
- 5
Although I have many hearing friends, I tend to spend the most time with my blind, deaf and deafblind friends because we've known each other for many years. I feel equally comfortable around each group, but find that I have more in common with my friends who are blind, deaf or deafblind.
InTheGenes
New Member
- Joined
- Oct 17, 2006
- Messages
- 230
- Reaction score
- 0
You're so lucky, and I'm so jealous! I WISH I had Deaf friends with whom I could improve my ASL. I have a Deaf cousin who lives half-way across the country from me, who I never get to see, and I have an infant nephew who is profoundly deaf who unfortunately can't sign very well yet.
Thankfully, as I become more immersed in the local Deaf community (via school's interpreting program), I'm coming into more and more contact with Deaf people. I'm glad to live so close Washington, DC... I feel I'd be at a disadvantage if I lived somewhere out in the middle of nowhere!
I'm still pretty shy with most new Deaf people I meet. A) I don't want to show how weak my ASL skills are (although they're getting better all the time), and B) I don't want to become one of those people that rushes up to every Deaf person I see to show what meager skills I DO possess. That would be annoying to me.
I guess I'll stick to silent dinners and silent weekends for now!
- Joined
- Sep 7, 2006
- Messages
- 45,078
- Reaction score
- 335
You're so lucky, and I'm so jealous! I WISH I had Deaf friends with whom I could improve my ASL. I have a Deaf cousin who lives half-way across the country from me, who I never get to see, and I have an infant nephew who is profoundly deaf who unfortunately can't sign very well yet.
Thankfully, as I become more immersed in the local Deaf community (via school's interpreting program), I'm coming into more and more contact with Deaf people. I'm glad to live so close Washington, DC... I feel I'd be at a disadvantage if I lived somewhere out in the middle of nowhere!
I'm still pretty shy with most new Deaf people I meet. A) I don't want to show how weak my ASL skills are (although they're getting better all the time), and B) I don't want to become one of those people that rushes up to every Deaf person I see to show what meager skills I DO possess. That would be annoying to me.
I guess I'll stick to silent dinners and silent weekends for now!
check out DeafDC.com for DPHH events. Good way to meet deaf people.
I go sometimes if my husband and I need a break from the kids or my friends want a girls' night out.InTheGenes,
You're not the only one, I'm deaf and my ASL skills are weak as well, I don't usual sign as often because my twin and I usually read each others lips and some signs are included but not all the time. When I meet other deafies and their signs are too quick to pick up, but I do have a lot of patient and tried to understand what they're saying, I would intend to read their lips and signs both at the same time.
back on topic:
I'm friends with both deaf and hearing people, there are some frustration on both sides depends on how deaf people and I communicate with signs and lip reading, and how hearing people commuicate with me on lip reading. When I surrounding myself with deaf people that are fluenty in signs, it helps me learn a thing or two from them boost my skills, many of them sign differently than I do, It does help me increase my knowledge on sign language when I'm with them.
You're not the only one, I'm deaf and my ASL skills are weak as well, I don't usual sign as often because my twin and I usually read each others lips and some signs are included but not all the time. When I meet other deafies and their signs are too quick to pick up, but I do have a lot of patient and tried to understand what they're saying, I would intend to read their lips and signs both at the same time.
back on topic:
I'm friends with both deaf and hearing people, there are some frustration on both sides depends on how deaf people and I communicate with signs and lip reading, and how hearing people commuicate with me on lip reading. When I surrounding myself with deaf people that are fluenty in signs, it helps me learn a thing or two from them boost my skills, many of them sign differently than I do, It does help me increase my knowledge on sign language when I'm with them.
- Joined
- Sep 7, 2006
- Messages
- 45,078
- Reaction score
- 335
I just chatted with a friend of mine on aim. He was venting how he hates hearing people. He is oral deaf and doesnt know sign so I asked him what made him say that. He said that during a meeting, he had some ideas to solve a problem at work and that his hearing co workers looked at each other and rolled their eyes and they said .."yea yea" and moved on to other people's ideas. I feel that is really rude and disrespectful of them to disregard him like that. I feel for him. Wow...he wants to meet deaf people but he hates deaf socials cuz he gets criticized for not knowing ASL.
I told him that the people at his work are rude and not all hearing people are like that and told him about this site.
I told him that the people at his work are rude and not all hearing people are like that and told him about this site.
yeah there are jerks every where. This is an Office environment?? That would not be acceptable in any of the jobs i've had. People who make stupid suggestions are always heard. That is not to say he was being stupid i am just saying everyone has their say whether the suggestion is a good one or a bad one. That is very unfortunate. Wow he is really stuck isn't he. Glad you told him about AD everyone has been great here and there are other Oral Deaf here as well. There will be a connection in that. People shouldn't feel alone in the world!!!