Deaf Culture Norms

[deafdrummer]

Hello!

I would like to know where I can find a definitive document ONLINE (only, don't have money for books at this time) of Deaf Culture norms, because I think that I have some of them that is causing me to be frustrated around hearing people socially. I think one of them is how to follow conversations and getting attention. Is it true that Deaf people consider interrupting a conversation in sign rude by straight-away signing about something completely different (like you're signing about the ball game, and suddenly the person who jumps in is signing to your friend about working on the car tomorrow, without saying, "Excuse me, I have to leave and need to ask Bob something")? I think it's incredibly rude when I am talking to someone and suddenly someone just walks into the room jumps right in to talk about something completely different as though I wasn't there and there was no conversation going on. When I approach some people talking, I always wait until they acknowledge me and ask me. I NEVER say a thing until then. I consider it rude if I do it before then.

Those who are Deaf, WHAT AM I DOING? Am I running around in the hearing world at my store and elsewhere with some Deaf behaviors? Almost forgot. When I pass through two hearing people talking (and can't go around them, like in a hallway), I say, "Excuse me" and duck my head under the line sight of their heads automatically.

HELP!

 

[VacationGuy234]

Hello!

I would like to know where I can find a definitive document ONLINE (only, don't have money for books at this time) of Deaf Culture norms, because I think that I have some of them that is causing me to be frustrated around hearing people socially. I think one of them is how to follow conversations and getting attention. Is it true that Deaf people consider interrupting a conversation in sign rude by straight-away signing about something completely different (like you're signing about the ball game, and suddenly the person who jumps in is signing to your friend about working on the car tomorrow, without saying, "Excuse me, I have to leave and need to ask Bob something")? I think it's incredibly rude when I am talking to someone and suddenly someone just walks into the room jumps right in to talk about something completely different as though I wasn't there and there was no conversation going on. When I approach some people talking, I always wait until they acknowledge me and ask me. I NEVER say a thing until then. I consider it rude if I do it before then.

Those who are Deaf, WHAT AM I DOING? Am I running around in the hearing world at my store and elsewhere with some Deaf behaviors? Almost forgot. When I pass through two hearing people talking (and can't go around them, like in a hallway), I say, "Excuse me" and duck my head under the line sight of their heads automatically.

HELP!

Well, I wouldn't go walking between two people who are signing as that would be rude. By the same token, it is rude to do the same thing to hearing people, but since they don't have to repeat what they say it's not as big a deal.

However, if you know how to sign. You will be able to understand the breaks in conversation better than an oral conversation which you cannot hear.

If you take an ASL class, they go over all these customs as you are learning.

 

[deafdrummer]

Well, I wouldn't go walking between two people who are signing as that would be rude. By the same token, it is rude to do the same thing to hearing people, but since they don't have to repeat what they say it's not as big a deal.

However, if you know how to sign. You will be able to understand the breaks in conversation better than an oral conversation which you cannot hear.

If you take an ASL class, they go over all these customs as you are learning.

I have, over 20 years ago. I may be acting on them subconsciously. I need to understand what is going on.

 

[drphil]

Presumably-"social norms of a specific Deaf group" are a local matter. Thus a "book" on a discussion might be considered to "understand" what the local group suggests as appropriate.

How relevant in one's life-contingent in how one "interacts" with a local group.

 

[Deanne]

I think interruptions are complicated whether its a hearing group or signing group. In hearing groups, it's usually accepted if the interupter is of a higher rank. For instance, if you and a buddy are talking at work and your boss comes up, that would not be rude. However if all people are equal than yes, it is rude in hearing world to just come up and change conversation. Remember though that a lot of people are rude.

I can't help as much with Deaf groups since my sign isn't fluent, but around here, with close friends, it's more space oriented. If it's a group of say 20 signers and 2 are off by themselves a few paces away, people wouldn't interrupt unless it was important, or someone was leaving, etc. If it's a party atmosphere it's different and there's a lot of hand waving going on

For walking through, I pass quickly through signing convos if I have to, but honestly hearing people shouldn't be blocking up the hallway. I usually say 'excuse me' to them but that's to point out to them that they're beign rude by blocking the hallway.

I'm not sure if any of that helps or not.......