My nephew will start college soon and I am concerned about how ready he is. A little background---he was born deaf and had cochlear implants when he was 2, and is now 17. He does fairly well, is athletic and highly intelligent. He has been mainstreamed all along and does not sign. The implants are wonderful in that he can speak, and move safely around his environment, however I estimate he depends 60-80% on lipreading. This has caused his speech to be somewhat affected, relative to a hearing person. He would never pass for a hearing person. In addition he has a serious language processing problem; his grammar is terrible, which causes him to test (very) poorly. Even things like the math on the SAT are structured as word problems and he has a very hard time translating that into equations. While he can speak he often omits articles, transposes words, etc., things that seem unrelated to his hearing loss.
These issues have made it very difficult for him to socialize at school and he is often alone. I worry that his parents desire to mainstream him have robbed him of the sense of community deaf peers may have provided. He has picked up on his parents desire for him to be "normal" and wants nothing to do with the deaf community. I fear he's in for a difficult, lonely, life if something doesn't change. I think (hope?) that a deaf college would provide the sense of community he's longing for though here would be a huge initial adjustment, and he will be resistant to the idea.
Making things more difficult is that he is very immature for his age. I believe his lack of socialization has stunted his emotional growth. His parents agree on this last point and are trying to help him find safe(er) venues to socialize with other kids his age. I think it would be very difficult for him to move away to school next year but he would misinterpret keeping him at home as some kind of punishment.
I know that's a lot. I love the kid to death and would do anything for him, but I'm the uncle, not a parent, and am a hearing person so can never truly understand what he's going through. I would appreciate hearing from anyone, parents or relatives, who've been through something similar.
Thanks for any help!
Tom
These issues have made it very difficult for him to socialize at school and he is often alone. I worry that his parents desire to mainstream him have robbed him of the sense of community deaf peers may have provided. He has picked up on his parents desire for him to be "normal" and wants nothing to do with the deaf community. I fear he's in for a difficult, lonely, life if something doesn't change. I think (hope?) that a deaf college would provide the sense of community he's longing for though here would be a huge initial adjustment, and he will be resistant to the idea.
Making things more difficult is that he is very immature for his age. I believe his lack of socialization has stunted his emotional growth. His parents agree on this last point and are trying to help him find safe(er) venues to socialize with other kids his age. I think it would be very difficult for him to move away to school next year but he would misinterpret keeping him at home as some kind of punishment.
I know that's a lot. I love the kid to death and would do anything for him, but I'm the uncle, not a parent, and am a hearing person so can never truly understand what he's going through. I would appreciate hearing from anyone, parents or relatives, who've been through something similar.
Thanks for any help!
Tom