Confusing stuff..

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AmberLynn

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Well, I have a bit of an issue...
I have like....4 different guys plus 1 girl after me, but I'm not seeking a relationship right now... And I just don't have the heart to tell them I don't want a relationship..
I was just in a pretty serious relationship for about a year and a half, and I guess I'm like, 'fresh meat' or something, idk...
Any advice?
 
you have to be honest otherwise you are leading them on. Just be tactful.
 
Just tell them, you are not ready for another relationship but you can always be friends with them.
 
AmberLynn said:
Well, I have a bit of an issue...
I have like....4 different guys plus 1 girl after me, but I'm not seeking a relationship right now... And I just don't have the heart to tell them I don't want a relationship..
I was just in a pretty serious relationship for about a year and a half, and I guess I'm like, 'fresh meat' or something, idk...
Any advice?
Click to expand...

I would just let it be, the only time this will be a problem is when you do decide on starting a relationship. The only exception is if they start to become aggressive and pushy or make you feel uncomfortable-then be tell them to back off!.
 
Leading them on sucks for them. Let them know before they find out the bittersweet truth that they have wasted a good chunk of their life on you for nothing. If you have already lead them on for so long, eh, it's on you now.
 
Just tell them straightforwardly.

I know some people who aren't straightforward and they end up hurting others. :(

There's one person I know who's very friendly and very likable. Unfortunately, she's too friendly in a manner that would make guys think she's interested in dating. She will go out with them to parties, dinners, clubs, etc... then she moves on to the next person like she's just busy with friends. She doesn't think that she's hurting anyone, but a lot of guys have gotten upset when they find out they wasted their time trying to date her when she was never interested in the first place. :roll:
 
AmberLynn said:
Well, I have a bit of an issue...
I have like....4 different guys plus 1 girl after me, but I'm not seeking a relationship right now... And I just don't have the heart to tell them I don't want a relationship..
I was just in a pretty serious relationship for about a year and a half, and I guess I'm like, 'fresh meat' or something, idk...
Any advice?
Click to expand...

it's not an issue at all. it's not even confusing either! you don't even need an advice because you already just said you are not seeking a relationship.

so an obvious answer is "sorry not interested in relationship". all you gotta do is tell them that via email/txt/IM/etc. if you're too shy to tell them that in person.

problem solved :cool2:
 
Look at it this way.....if it was you who wanted to be with a person, would you want them to lead you on or tell you the facts of that person's state of mind? You mind is made up for right now and you need to stand your ground but you also owe to yourself to learn how to be gentle with telling others and getting them to understand your position. So I say let each of them have 5 minutes of your time to be able to explain to them.
 
rolling7 said:
Look at it this way.....if it was you who wanted to be with a person, would you want them to lead you on or tell you the facts of that person's state of mind? You mind is made up for right now and you need to stand your ground but you also owe to yourself to learn how to be gentle with telling others and getting them to understand your position. So I say let each of them have 5 minutes of your time to be able to explain to them.
Click to expand...

Well said.
 
AmberLynn said:
Well, I have a bit of an issue...
I have like....4 different guys plus 1 girl after me, but I'm not seeking a relationship right now... And I just don't have the heart to tell them I don't want a relationship..
I was just in a pretty serious relationship for about a year and a half, and I guess I'm like, 'fresh meat' or something, idk...
Any advice?
Click to expand...

If you don't want to be super confrontational, you could drop hints and let it slip in a convo that you have no intention of dating/relationship for a while or how much you enjoy being single, and let them follow up with more questions if needed. But eventually, you will have to make sure you got your point across.
 
If now's not the time for a relationship, now's not the time. But don't give them false hope for the future or they'll be waiting around for something that may never come around.
 
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