Peachy Lady
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- Joined
- May 22, 2003
- Messages
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The couple was 85 years old, and had been married for
60 years. Though they were far from rich, they managed
to get by because they watched their pennies. And,
though not young, they were both in very good health,
largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods
and exercise for the last three decades.
One day, their good health didn't help when they went
on a rare vacation and their car crashed, sending them
off to Heaven. They reached the Pearly Gates, and St.
Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a
beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks,
with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the
master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their
favorite clothes, freshly pressed, in the closet. They
gasped in astonishment when he said, "Welcome to
Heaven. This will be your home now."
The old man asked Peter how much all this was going to
cost. "Why, nothing," Peter replied, "remember, this is your
reward in Heaven.
The old man looked out the window and saw a
championship golf course, finer and more beautiful
than any ever-built on Earth. "What are the green
fees?" grumbled the old man.
"This is heaven," St. Peter replied. "You can play for
free, every day, any starting time you wish."
Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish
buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out
before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts,
free flowing beverages and a fountain of champagne.
"Don't even ask," said St. Peter to the couple. "This
is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy."
The old man looked around and glanced nervously at his
wife. "Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol
foods, and the decaffeinated tea?" heasked.
"That's the best part," St. Peter replied. "You can
eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you
like, and you will never get fat or sick. This is
Heaven!"
The old man pushed, "No gym to work out at?"
"Not unless you want to," was the answer.
"No testing my sugar or blood pressure or..."
"Never again. All you do here is enjoy yourself."
The old man glared at his wife and said, "You and your
fat-free bran muffins. We could have been here 20
years ago!"
60 years. Though they were far from rich, they managed
to get by because they watched their pennies. And,
though not young, they were both in very good health,
largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods
and exercise for the last three decades.
One day, their good health didn't help when they went
on a rare vacation and their car crashed, sending them
off to Heaven. They reached the Pearly Gates, and St.
Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a
beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks,
with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the
master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their
favorite clothes, freshly pressed, in the closet. They
gasped in astonishment when he said, "Welcome to
Heaven. This will be your home now."
The old man asked Peter how much all this was going to
cost. "Why, nothing," Peter replied, "remember, this is your
reward in Heaven.
The old man looked out the window and saw a
championship golf course, finer and more beautiful
than any ever-built on Earth. "What are the green
fees?" grumbled the old man.
"This is heaven," St. Peter replied. "You can play for
free, every day, any starting time you wish."
Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish
buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out
before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts,
free flowing beverages and a fountain of champagne.
"Don't even ask," said St. Peter to the couple. "This
is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy."
The old man looked around and glanced nervously at his
wife. "Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol
foods, and the decaffeinated tea?" heasked.
"That's the best part," St. Peter replied. "You can
eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you
like, and you will never get fat or sick. This is
Heaven!"
The old man pushed, "No gym to work out at?"
"Not unless you want to," was the answer.
"No testing my sugar or blood pressure or..."
"Never again. All you do here is enjoy yourself."
The old man glared at his wife and said, "You and your
fat-free bran muffins. We could have been here 20
years ago!"
