Different types of lies

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Liebling:-)))

Liebling:-)))

Sussi *7.7.86 - 18.6.09*
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Lies can be told for many reasons.

http://www.yeartosuccess.com/google.cgi?searchengine+form2+Never, Ever Lie.html

What are lies?
In the dictionary it says that to tell a lie is to purposely say something that is not true because you want to make other people believe it.


Why do people tell lies?
Here are some of the reasons why kids might tell lies.

When it's never OK to tell lies

When it's sometimes OK to tell lies (white lies)

Is saying nothing the same as telling lies?

How some lies can affect all of us

This is what some children said about telling lies

Is saying nothing the same as telling lies?

Are some lies not as bad as others?

http://www.cyh.com/HealthTopics/HealthTopicDetailsKids.aspx?p=335&np=287&id=1485

Why people tell lies
“Are you saying it’s okay for him to lie to me?”

“No, I’m not saying it’s okay or not okay. I’m not making a value judgment about it. You asked why he’s lying and I’m telling you why. Lying is just another form of protection against pain, just as your anger is a form of protection against pain.”

“So what do I do? How do I deal with this?”
Click to expand...
further read in this link

http://www.peopleoffaith.com/why-do-people-lie.htm

Lies and fibs

Reasons why children lie

http://www.parentlink.act.gov.au/parentguides/parentg_liesandfibs.htm


What is a lie
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Forum/1611/sins22lies5a.html

Different types of liars.

http://boycottliberalism.com/Commentary/Lies.htm

http://quotes.watchtower.ca/lie.htm

Why Children Tell Lies - And How to Stop Them
http://childparenting.about.com/library/prm/aa112001a.htm

Three Lies Children Tell...and What You Can Do About Them
http://childparenting.about.com/od/lyingandstealing/a/kidslying.htm


Come and share your discuss/feedback with us. Agree to Disagree is welcome with no bash & insult. :)
 
It's not okay to lie to someone, because, lies are hurtful. They also cause mistrust amongst people. Even a "white lie" shouldn't be told. It's my belief that you can tell someone the truth; even a brutal truth, gently. If someone were to lie to me, I would not only mistrust them, but I would also lose respect for that person.

In the case of lying in front of children or with their awareness of it, that is never a good thing to do. It teaches a child that lying is a good way to get what he or she wants, or it teaches them that it's okay to do certain things because so and so "won't know". The child never learns there are no consequences for his or her actions.

It's never a good to lie.
 
My hubby started smoke when he was 13 years old with his cliques. He put cigarette into his jacket pocket quickly before his teacher caught him but he wasn't realize that there're few to burn to hole his jacket's pocket.

He went home for the weekends from school. His mother got his jacket to wash. She saw hole and knew straight way it's cigarette and got her husband to confront him with hole pocket jacket together and scream then smack his face/head but he defend himself from their hands. After that happened, he LOST his trust to them.

Worst is they found porn magazines under my hubby's bed when he was 16 years old. They confronted him and scream on him and call him prevert etc. It make him hide more and more from them. They were mad when they found out that my hubby is liar and deny their words etc. Who's the fault???????????? Of course, my hubby's parents!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's them who "force" them into liar. No wonder why he do that to defend himself.


That´s reason why my hubby lie.

There´re many different reasons why the people lie.

It´s worst is black lie because it´s form of betrayal.

I have an experience to deal with people who have types of lies... One and big worst, whom I thought a person is my dear friend is betray our friendship in lie way which it´s hurtful. It took me long time to forgive a person. What a person do is betrayal. I show no understand for that.

MIL is stubborn and refuse to accept that she has pain with her breast. She told doctor that she is okay which it´s not true. She "lie" doctor for some reason is fear to face that she is sick. The situation goes worst so she faced the doctor the truth and then found out that she has bad cancer in her breast... her breast has to removed after keep herself for 6 months. Would we label her as "liar"? No, I would not label her "liar". She only do that out of fear to face that she is sick.

Yes, I know that lying is not okay but there´re many form of lying where there´re many reasons.

Example:
A person, I can´t stand come around my house unexpectly. I refused to answer the door for him but let him think that I´m not in home.

Of course I make an excuse sometimes why I can´t make up to avoid any problems from the people when I know they are too touchy & senstive.

Like what I say there´re many different types of lies.

If you want make your children into honest person then not scream/scare them with punishment if they make mistakes. They will turn into liar if you do that.

My children knows that lying is not acceptance and know the difference.

Sometimes my children ask me to let their mates know that they are not in home for some reasons. I answered the door and told them that my children are not in home.

For me betrayal with lying is number one and terrible one to hurt friendship, partners, family etc.


Remember that nobody are prefect.

Come and share your feedback/opinion.....
 
Liebling:-))) said:
My hubby started smoke when he was 13 years old with his cliques. He put cigarette into his jacket pocket quickly before his teacher caught him but he wasn't realize that there're few to burn to hole his jacket's pocket.

He went home for the weekends from school. His mother got his jacket to wash. She saw hole and knew straight way it's cigarette and got her husband to confront him with hole pocket jacket together and scream then smack his face/head but he defend himself from their hands. After that happened, he LOST his trust to them.

Worst is they found porn magazines under my hubby's bed when he was 16 years old. They confronted him and scream on him and call him prevert etc. It make him hide more and more from them. They were mad when they found out that my hubby is liar and deny their words etc. Who's the fault???????????? Of course, my hubby's parents!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's them who "force" them into liar. No wonder why he do that to defend himself.


That´s reason why my hubby lie.

There´re many different reasons why the people lie.

It´s worst is black lie because it´s form of betrayal.

I have an experience to deal with people who have types of lies... One and big worst, whom I thought a person is my dear friend is betray our friendship in lie way which it´s hurtful. It took me long time to forgive a person. What a person do is betrayal. I show no understand for that.

MIL is stubborn and refuse to accept that she has pain with her breast. She told doctor that she is okay which it´s not true. She "lie" doctor for some reason is fear to face that she is sick. The situation goes worst so she faced the doctor the truth and then found out that she has bad cancer in her breast... her breast has to removed after keep herself for 6 months. Would we label her as "liar"? No, I would not label her "liar". She only do that out of fear to face that she is sick.

Yes, I know that lying is not okay but there´re many form of lying where there´re many reasons.

Example:
A person, I can´t stand come around my house unexpectly. I refused to answer the door for him but let him think that I´m not in home.

Of course I make an excuse sometimes why I can´t make up to avoid any problems from the people when I know they are too touchy & senstive.

Like what I say there´re many different types of lies.

If you want make your children into honest person then not scream/scare them with punishment if they make mistakes. They will turn into liar if you do that.

My children knows that lying is not acceptance and know the difference.

Sometimes my children ask me to let their mates know that they are not in home for some reasons. I answered the door and told them that my children are not in home.

For me betrayal with lying is number one and terrible one to hurt friendship, partners, family etc.


Come and share your feedback/opinion.....
Click to expand...

His parents had a right to do that. He was thirteen. He wasn't "forced" to lie. All kids do at that age. I lied at 13. Kids want to get themselves out of whatever mess they find themselves in; the quickest way they can. Fortunately for parents, most kids are dumb as hell, and get caught. This is what happened to your husband. He got caught. Don't blame his parents. Blame your husband for his bad behavior. He wasn't forced to lie. He did so on his own accord.

When a child lies, of course, the parent will be displeased with them. Any good parent would be. There has to be consequences for actions, and if you don't teach your child what is acceptable and what is not, you aren't being a good parent.
 
I am sure we have all told little white lies in our lifetime, but that does not make it okay. Just because I have a "reason" to lie, does not condone the lie. I have found that I would rather just not address an issue than feel I have to lie about it. Regardless of reasons for lying, there are always consequences if the lie is discovered, regardless of how big or small the lie is. If I lie on a job application and get the job, yet later my employer finds out I lied, I will be fired. If I cheat on my husband and he finds out about it 2 years later, more than likely he will leave me. Lying will cause others not to trust me, and when I do get caught there will be some form of repercussion for the lie.
 
*UGH*

Why can't you accept being "white lie" ??? You had done "white lie" least nobody perfect.. Maybe you did white lie your own BOSS or PARENT or er um... so many different things what you did!

*ahem*
Seems both of you guys cannot accept "white lie" THAN BLOODY LIE!
I think you're trying avoid issues "white lie".. Deny??? Aren't you admit ?
*scoff laughing*
 
Everyone lies, All children start lying at the age of 4 or 5, they lied just to get out of trouble or get something they want. It's the truth. You also lied to protect people's feelings, It depends how big and how small you lie. I dislike when people lied to my face, That's when the issue of trust is on the line. That's why I teach my boys to tell me the truth no matter how bad it is. But, honestly lies doesn't get you anywhere, You get caught, once you do, it gets worse. That's why telling the truth sets you free. ;)
 
Bullym0m said:
*UGH*

Why can't you accept being "white lie" ??? You had done "white lie" least nobody perfect.. Maybe you did white lie your own BOSS or PARENT or er um... so many different things what you did!

*ahem*
Seems both of you guys cannot accept "white lie" THAN BLOODY LIE!
I think you're trying avoid issues "white lie".. Deny??? Aren't you admit ?
*scoff laughing*
Click to expand...

:laugh2: :laugh2: :laugh2:
 
Oceanbreeze said:
It's not okay to lie to someone, because, lies are hurtful. They also cause mistrust amongst people. Even a "white lie" shouldn't be told. It's my belief that you can tell someone the truth; even a brutal truth, gently. If someone were to lie to me, I would not only mistrust them, but I would also lose respect for that person.
Click to expand...

Yes, I can image it´s hurtful to lie someone, you know very well. I would NEVER do that to my friends. I am a straightforward and open mind person and tell them what I think. This is an exactly what Cheri said... "telling the truth sets you free".

Oceanbreeze´s post
His parents had a right to do that. He was thirteen. He wasn't "forced" to lie. All kids do at that age. I lied at 13. Kids want to get themselves out of whatever mess they find themselves in; the quickest way they can. Fortunately for parents, most kids are dumb as hell, and get caught. This is what happened to your husband. He got caught. Don't blame his parents. Blame your husband for his bad behavior. He wasn't forced to lie. He did so on his own accord.

When a child lies, of course, the parent will be displeased with them. Any good parent would be. There has to be consequences for actions, and if you don't teach your child what is acceptable and what is not, you aren't being a good parent.
Click to expand...

Disagree:
The form of discipline lead the children to liar.
If you want to make your children into honest then you should calm down and talk to them why they did wrong without scream or punish them in hard way. The reason the child tell lie because of this, they are scared.
I explained my children why it´s not right... It belongs patience.
Yes, I lie to my parents when I was a child because I want to protect myself for get hurt from them.

Eve´s post
I am sure we have all told little white lies in our lifetime, but that does not make it okay.
Click to expand...

Exactly.

Regardless of reasons for lying, there are always consequences if the lie is discovered, regardless of how big or small the lie is.
Click to expand...

Yeah, it depend on kind of "lies" (It doesnt mean that lying is okay but just depend on form of lying...

If I lie on a job application and get the job, yet later my employer finds out I lied, I will be fired.
Click to expand...

Exactly! but how could you lie on a job application? It´s impossible because the employer demand the proof of your document, references of your previous job, school skill, etc before he/she accept you in. It´s impossible to fake anything... I apply for a job then have to add the proofs where I work, school skill, etc. It sound that proof of documents are not require in your country. Right?

If I cheat on my husband and he finds out about it 2 years later, more than likely he will leave me.
Click to expand...

Exactly! It hurt trust.

Lying will cause others not to trust me, and when I do get caught there will be some form of repercussion for the lie.
Click to expand...

Yes, I know. Like what Cheri said: "telling the truth sets you free"

Like what I said that there´re many different type of lies to protect themselves from getting hurt... simple example to doctor, not in home etc.


Cheri´s post
Everyone lies, All children start lying at the age of 4 or 5, they lied just to get out of trouble or get something they want. It's the truth. You also lied to protect people's feelings, It depends how big and how small you lie.
Click to expand...

Exactly, there´re type of lying but it doesn´t mean that it turn you into liar.

I dislike when people lied to my face, That's when the issue of trust is on the line.
Click to expand...

Yes, me either. I don´t like it, too. I would ask them why they do that to me because it hurt my trust. Most of my friends are straightforward and open mind, that´s why I has no problem with them. They knows that I´m not touchy person as I know they are not touchy people, too.

That's why I teach my boys to tell me the truth no matter how bad it is. But, honestly lies doesn't get you anywhere, You get caught, once you do, it gets worse. That's why telling the truth sets you free.
Click to expand...

Exactly, that´s what I do the same with my children. If I want them into honest people then talk to them in calm way why I think they did wrong... then it would be easier for them to open anything to talk with me without fear.

Bullym0m´s post
Why can't you accept being "white lie" ??? You had done "white lie" least nobody perfect
Click to expand...

Yeah, everyone tell white lie... I would NEVER beleive people´s claim that they NEVER tell lie in their life because I know nobody are prefect. Some tell white lies to protect to hurt other´s feeling.
 
Yeah, everyone tell white lie... I would NEVER beleive people´s claim that they NEVER tell lie in their life because I know nobody are prefect. Some tell white lies to protect to hurt other´s feeling.
Click to expand...

Extactly.. same thing everyones.. Of course, I do agree w/you nobody perfect.. "Not mean hurt them which their good reasons".

until tell truth , will set you free... Will come no problem..
Than bloody lies!
 
Oh yes, I forget to tell you what I saw on US movie "Sabrina" on TV today. Julia Ormond & Harrison Ford play. Very good and sad movie....

I saw what it mention "lie" by coincidence. Harrison Ford play as eldest brother Linus of David lie to hurt Julia as Sabrina´s feeling. He has good reason to tell her lie because he think she is still in love with David, his youngest brother. (he´s jealous of David). Later Sabrina forgive Linus for that and love him again... :tears: story. (I´m toooo romantic person)...

Have you heard about "Sabrina"?
 
I've lied as a kid because I was afraid of being painted as a failure and thusly rejected/abandoned. But my father eventually instilled a deep sense of honesty, and it is much easier for me to be truthful than to lie... less consequences that way? :giggle: Ex - I had a fender bender, and it was totally my fault.. sans the front bumper, I called my dad out of his apartment and told him pretty quickly.. and accepted responsibility.. he just stood there, speechless.. "Oh geee.." with a hand clapping on his forehead.. but that was it :) If I hadn't come up front quickly, he would have said more than just "Oh geee.." in that amusing way. That was positive reinforcement on my part. I don't believe in instilling fear as an incentive to be honest - there's gonna be problems down the line eventually with that fear, anyway - IMO.

However, in adult situations, white lies are pretty amusing... and no big deal. Pretty much one can tell if it's a white lie or not, if they ask hard enough. I honestly don't care about that. My life is not laying on a bare thread. ;) I also find it easier to be honest with someone who is open to it. It is not easy being honest with someone you know that will not react very well to that honesty. But in the end, it's always better to be honest regardless. And you decide if the situation calls for it or not.. then stick to your guns even if they might go off on your foot.

Interesting thread, Liebling :)
 
Oceanbreeze said:
It's not okay to lie to someone, because, lies are hurtful. They also cause mistrust amongst people. Even a "white lie" shouldn't be told. It's my belief that you can tell someone the truth; even a brutal truth, gently. If someone were to lie to me, I would not only mistrust them, but I would also lose respect for that person.

In the case of lying in front of children or with their awareness of it, that is never a good thing to do. It teaches a child that lying is a good way to get what he or she wants, or it teaches them that it's okay to do certain things because so and so "won't know". The child never learns there are no consequences for his or her actions.

It's never a good to lie.
Click to expand...
:gpost:
 
Liebling:-))) said:
Oh yes, I forget to tell you what I saw on US movie "Sabrina" on TV today. Julia Ormond & Harrison Ford play. Very good and sad movie....
Have you heard about "Sabrina"?
Click to expand...
I saw the original version with Audrey Hepburn and Humphrey Bogart.
 
Maybe we need to clarify what we mean by "reason" for lying.

Do you mean "reasons" as in what were the motivations behind the lies?

Or do you mean "reason" as in making a justification for the lie?

There are reasons (motivations) for lying but there is no reason (justification) for lying.
 
Liebling:-))) said:
Yes, I can image it´s hurtful to lie someone, you know very well. I would NEVER do that to my friends. I am a straightforward and open mind person and tell them what I think. This is an exactly what Cheri said... "telling the truth sets you free".



Disagree:
The form of discipline lead the children to liar.
If you want to make your children into honest then you should calm down and talk to them why they did wrong without scream or punish them in hard way. The reason the child tell lie because of this, they are scared.
I explained my children why it´s not right... It belongs patience.
Yes, I lie to my parents when I was a child because I want to protect myself for get hurt from them.

Eve´s post


Exactly.



Yeah, it depend on kind of "lies" (It doesnt mean that lying is okay but just depend on form of lying...



Exactly! but how could you lie on a job application? It´s impossible because the employer demand the proof of your document, references of your previous job, school skill, etc before he/she accept you in. It´s impossible to fake anything... I apply for a job then have to add the proofs where I work, school skill, etc. It sound that proof of documents are not require in your country. Right?



Exactly! It hurt trust.



Yes, I know. Like what Cheri said: "telling the truth sets you free"

Like what I said that there´re many different type of lies to protect themselves from getting hurt... simple example to doctor, not in home etc.




Exactly, there´re type of lying but it doesn´t mean that it turn you into liar.



Yes, me either. I don´t like it, too. I would ask them why they do that to me because it hurt my trust. Most of my friends are straightforward and open mind, that´s why I has no problem with them. They knows that I´m not touchy person as I know they are not touchy people, too.



Exactly, that´s what I do the same with my children. If I want them into honest people then talk to them in calm way why I think they did wrong... then it would be easier for them to open anything to talk with me without fear.



Yeah, everyone tell white lie... I would NEVER beleive people´s claim that they NEVER tell lie in their life because I know nobody are prefect. Some tell white lies to protect to hurt other´s feeling.
Click to expand...


There's a huge difference between children's lies and when adults lie. Small children don't really know the difference between fantasy and reality until they reach the age of five, so they have to be tought what is acceptable and what isn't. And, yes. Everyone here has lied at least once. However as one ages, it becomes unacceptable for the person to tell lies. Adults have no busy lying to other adults and children need to be tought that telling lies isn't good behavior.

As for what you said about white lies being acceptable, I don't see how you figure that. Maybe, because, most people get away with telling white lies. Just because someone gets away with it doesn't make it right.
 
errr..
Okay.. Here's your test "The white lie test"

The White lie test

My answer...
Results of "The Test"
How many white lies do you tell?

Your score = 50
Your score


What does your score mean?

You seem to believe in the virtue of honesty, but don't apply it blindly without consideration for the specifics of the situation. You level with others when it seems like the best thing to do, but also know when it's better to keep your mouth zipped. The truth, you know, can be cruel and sometimes it's simply kinder to tell a little fib. If you've ever seen the movie Liar Liar, you know what can happen if we share everything we think! Continue using your judgment, and make sure you soften the harsh truth when you do decide to deliver it.

*chuckles*~ :fruit:

Now what yours???
 
Your score = 10






What does your score mean?
The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth - that seems to be your motto. In most situations, you don't hesitate to tell it like it is, regardless of your impact on other people's feelings. Chances are you truly believe that honesty is the best policy - and in the majority of cases, you may be right. With regards to some more delicate areas, however, a white lie now and then may actually be the kind thing to do. What harm is it, for example, to pretend you like the gaudy doily your grandmother crocheted for you? Use your judgment to decide whether telling the truth is the right thing to do in different situations. And when you do choose to shoot from the hip, make sure you do it a gentle, sensitive way. People will be more likely to listen if you show respect for their feelings.
 
And when you do choose to shoot from the hip, make sure you do it a gentle, sensitive way. People will be more likely to listen if you show respect for their feelings.
Click to expand...

That I AGREE!!!!


Good thread Liebling, I think Liza pretty much cover what I would say on this....I also agree with some members on this thread, so there's no reason for me to say my piece! :D
 
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