Don't Be Naive

Jiro

Jiro

If You Know What I Mean
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Starting Over, With a Bad Attitude
Let me be clear. I am A.B.D. in my discipline of art history. I did not finish my dissertation. I had a horrible adviser: a noncommunicative boozer and a womanizer, with no voice mail or e-mail, who didn't care much for me. I was 25 when I began my Ph.D., and instead of being lauded for my pluck and verve, I was eyed like a fresh piece of meat that he wanted to devour.

To make a long story short, I left after my coursework. I figured, what the hell? The job listings always say employers want three or more years of teaching experience beyond the teaching-assistant level. If I wanted to be a liberal-arts professor at a small, quaint college, I was going to have to get that experience somehow, even with a Ph.D.

So I started teaching at a community college. Though I got the job just to pay my teaching dues, I discovered that it suited me. I love teaching, unlike many academics who loathe having to leave their research caves to serve the undergraduate masses. I thought: "Hey, this isn't bad! Tenure after four years, no publications, an administration that actually wants you to focus on teaching. ... Easy Street, baby."

But I soon realized that teaching at a community college is far from Easy Street. I work at a McDonald's of higher education, where most of the students treat faculty like we are cashiers to their customers. Administration in turn treats students like little dollar signs that fill out our enrollments, so for heaven's sake don't drop them, even though they are far from college-ready. I was trapped in the business model and couldn't get out. Where is the life of the mind that I was so eager to live?

Instead of spinning into a spiral of self-loathing and institutional hatred, I thought: "What can I do to get out of this predicament?" I couldn't go back to Boozer U. (a state research university), where I did my graduate coursework. That tie was long severed, and the credits from my coursework had expired.

What about Local State U.? Its reputation isn't so bad. Maybe I could get a doctorate in education. That's very trendy in community-college circles. And maybe I could finish up my art-history degree while I was at it. I'd be a doctor twice. Pretty cool.

I checked out the college's Web site. I couldn't help but laugh. The art-history department eloquently explains how the program is research-driven and teaches you to analytically apply your knowledge to primary documents. Good God, when was the last time I saw a primary document? I'm usually buried in administrative paperwork or grading.

And neither art history nor education gives a placement rate. The site doesn't mention that maybe one of the 12 students in a class will get a liberal-arts or research post, and that most graduates will wind up at community colleges and never be required to do research. The site also never mentions the worst option: graduates who will be lifelong adjuncts with no benefits, security, or respect.

This disregard for the reality of job placement is a fact of academic life. No one talks about what the hell you are supposed to do upon graduating from the life of the mind. And when you are ingenious and chart your own destiny, as I've tried to do, no one is all that impressed. When I told my adviser at Boozer U. that I was being interviewed for the job I currently hold, he said, "Well, that's nice, but it's just community college." Ouch. So much for being a beacon to other graduate students, proof that it's possible to get a job.

Beyond the ridiculous rhetoric and the falsehoods regarding job prospects, there was another side to returning to graduate school that worried me: Could I take it seriously, knowing what I know? I wanted the degree, but could I sit through another seminar on Lacanian interpretations of Duchamp's oeuvre without laughing (bitterly) and pointing out to the other fresh-faced students that they should enjoy this level of intellectual discourse now, because it's going to come to a screeching halt when they are teaching five classes of "Art Interpretation for the Nonmajor" at Small-Town Community College?

I remember my misplaced belief that I was going to be a scholar. I would teach in New York City and run a gallery while collaborating on performance-art pieces at PS 1! Thank God for the idiocy of youth. If not for that, I probably would never have plunged in.

I admit that now, at 35, my shininess is wearing off a bit. I'm starting to get cynical about the system I'm stuck in, the hick town I'm shackled to, and the other indignities I feel the universe has lobbed at me. My life was not supposed to be this way. I went into academe to escape small-town West Virginia, only to wind up in small-town Florida. In a way, I've come right back to where I started.

To some I seem blessed, but I often feel conflicted, lost, and confused. Should I share that with my potential new grad-school cohort and possibly shatter their world? Or will they appreciate my honesty and the fact that I'm trying to spare them from future pain brought on by naïve idealism?

And returning to a classroom—don't get me started. Could I allow the professors to run the classes? Could I be a good student? I used to be an awesome student, pencils sharpened, the reading done and meticulously analyzed. I lived for round-table discussions on intellectual theories of the day.

But now I've taught classes of my own for eight years. Would I be able to let a professor speak without constantly interjecting? I can imagine being that annoying know-it-all who everyone wants to kick in the face. Now that I'm a professor myself, could I become just a student again?

Don't get me wrong, I love to learn. I can't get enough of TED lectures, smarthistory.org, and art21 videos. But I guess I'm feeling jaded about formal education on some level. I don't know if I'd be able to take my assignments seriously this time around. I probably won't be asked to improve my core discipline, but I'm sure I'll be asked to learn new teaching fads. I've seen how my administration has fallen prey to rubrics and student assessments, how group work and "active learning" have displaced the role of a good sage on the stage. So why does it matter if I learn some new theory about art history? No one cares.

I don't feel the joy I once did in teaching, but I know that's not about me but about the system. Could I unleash that attitude on a roomful of Ph.D. candidates without inflicting irreparable harm? I don't know if I can suppress it. It's bound to come up when I'm asked why I've returned to grad school.

It's like knowing the end to a bad movie and being forced to watch it anyway. I know my classes will never bring up the important stuff, like how to really teach. The first time around, I didn't find that odd. I just watched my mentors and worked out my style as I went along. It was a little like informed improvisation. I mean really, how many of you (except for education majors) had a class on syllabus construction while doing your graduate work? Or one on disrespectful student behavior and how to handle it? Or one on how to construct a rubric? But that is what I deal with every day, not "Paradigms of the Other in New Liminal Postcolonial Spaces."

So, can you go back? Can you start over? Can you smile and pretend enough to get your means to an end?

I don't know. But I guess I'll start filling out that application now.

Jen Robinson is an associate professor of art history at Tallahassee Community College.
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this further reinforces my argument with my friends about this subject when we talked about careers and colleges.
 
shel90 said:
Can you give some of us who arent familiar with that argument a little background? Thanks.
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oh sorry -

I tell people that it's great and all to pursue your dream in college and then to get a career from it but looking at our current state of economy and reality... it's going to end up with disappointment and debts.

College is expensive. It's a place where you go and pay to learn skill to use to make money. But in order to choose which skill you want to specialize in, you have to be realistic. Don't we all want to make a good living from our dream jobs?

If you have an ability to do the job that will reap in $$$$$$ even though it's not an enjoyable job.... just suck it up because it's all about money. Let's admit it - money doesn't buy happiness but happiness costs money. When you have no constant stress and worry from bills, you'll live a happy life. When you earn a good money, then that means you can afford to pursue your dream job after work or on weekend. and that also means you can afford to help people you care about.

Take me for example. I hate programming. I loathe it. But I majored in it because I have a capability to do it and I knew I would make a good living from it. With that, I was able to pursue my motorcycle hobby and not live in ghetto studio room. I don't make $$$$$$$$$$$$$$ but it's just enough to keep me from insanity and depression... and not to live on paycheck-to-paycheck.

So.... if you have a smart to do accounting or marketing or whatever that can bring home the steak instead of bacon.... then do it. I reiterate - Money doesn't buy happiness but happiness costs money.
 
Of course colleges look at people as dollar signs. The recruiters are nothing but salesmen and women. Going to the college I went to I saw that. Schools wanting people to do good and pass. I seen a girl that was miserable in school and they kept talking her into not withdrawing. She finally withdrew towards the end, by that time... too late. She will have to pay her student loans off and not get any type of certificate or degree. The girl was a miserable person to begin with.

So I do see what Jiro is saying.

It does not mean people should not pursue their higher education or careers. Just mean it is how Colleges are now a days.

Like Jiro. I went back to school to make more $$.
 
Babyblue said:
Of course colleges look at people as dollar signs. The recruiters are nothing but salesmen and women. Going to the college I went to I saw that. Schools wanting people to do good and pass. I seen a girl that was miserable in school and they kept talking her into not withdrawing. She finally withdrew towards the end, by that time... too late. She will have to pay her student loans off and not get any type of certificate or degree. The girl was a miserable person to begin with.

So I do see what Jiro is saying.

It does not mean people should not pursue their higher education or careers. Just mean it is how Colleges are now a days.

Like Jiro. I went back to school to make more $$.
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I do want people to pursue higher education because it's the FACT that generally, people with college diploma do get more pay and promotions than those with none.

But college is very expensive so people should be realistic about their future and they should choose a major that is viable and profitable. Majoring in English.... or Art.... I feel sorry for them because majority of them have jobs that do not generate enough money to pay for bills. Because of that, they were forced to do jobs not related to their skill.

The only way to do well in life if you major in English or Art is to be very talented in it - a natural born talent and connected. otherwise..... you'll be limited to teaching job or something depressing - hard work for little pay. I really wish our government does something about our teachers. It should be their priority to ensure that our teachers make a good living because it's a very hard job and they're basically our children's babysitter, guardian, and tutor.
 
Wirelessly posted

This person sounds like exactly the kind of idiot I dealt with on a daily basis when I was in grad shcool. Trust me, there's not much they could have done in the real world had they pursued a more practical course of study. They are socially inept except when dealing with their own kind, completely naive about how the world works, and have a sense of entitlement that knows no limit. I'm so glad to be out of grad school and doing something productive and only minorly related to my field of study.
 
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TheWriteAlex said:
Wirelessly posted

This person sounds like exactly the kind of idiot I dealt with on a daily basis when I was in grad shcool. Trust me, there's not much they could have done in the real world had they pursued a more practical course of study. They are socially inept except when dealing with their own kind, completely naive about how the world works, and have a sense of entitlement that knows no limit. I'm so glad to be out of grad school and doing something productive and only minorly related to my field of study.
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If they're socially-inept intellectual buffoons.... it wouldn't matter what course of study they pursued anyway. They're that type who either still lives with their mommy or stay in school for decades.
 
Jiro said:
I do want people to pursue higher education because it's the FACT that generally, people with college diploma do get more pay and promotions than those with none.

But college is very expensive so people should be realistic about their future and they should choose a major that is viable and profitable. Majoring in English.... or Art.... I feel sorry for them because majority of them have jobs that do not generate enough money to pay for bills. Because of that, they were forced to do jobs not related to their skill.

The only way to do well in life if you major in English or Art is to be very talented in it - a natural born talent and connected. otherwise..... you'll be limited to teaching job or something depressing - hard work for little pay. I really wish our government does something about our teachers. It should be their priority to ensure that our teachers make a good living because it's a very hard job and they're basically our children's babysitter, guardian, and tutor.
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sometimes someone who learned a trade makes more money than someone who has a PhD but teaching at a community college.

If only youth has the gift of foresight. If I knew 20 years ago what I know now, I wouldn't have majored in history at all!

And I think it's especially important for young deaf people to be educated while still in high school about realities of life after college so they would make smarter choices in what they choose to study in college.
 
DeafCaroline said:
sometimes someone who learned a trade makes more money than someone who has a PhD but teaching at a community college.
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no doubt! Point is - somebody went to school to learn something that makes $$$money$$$ - trade school, college, or artisan. Imagine a person going to trade school to learn knitting a patterned sweater instead of building/repairing machinery. Sorry but knitting is not gonna put enough food on the plate for family because the reality is that nobody is going to pay a lot for "hand-made sweater". They flock to Wal-Mart for it.

DeafCaroline said:
If only youth has the gift of foresight. If I knew 20 years ago what I know now, I wouldn't have majored in history at all!

And I think it's especially important for young deaf people to be educated while still in high school about realities of life after college so they would make smarter choices in what they choose to study in college.
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ain't that a sad cruel truth? only if young'uns would just not be stubborn :lol:
 
Bob Ross can actually make a living on his dream. Why? Cuz he can paint a happy tree that makes people happy. He's still richer than us even though he's long dead. How sad is that? :lol:

Now I need me a happy tree...
 
Jiro said:
If they're socially-inept intellectual buffoons.... it wouldn't matter what course of study they pursued anyway. They're that type who either still lives with their mommy or stay in school for decades.
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Exactly.
 
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