Parents-know-best view 'outdated'

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Liebling:-)))

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Parents-know-best view 'outdated'

The view parents know what is best for their children is old fashioned and out of date, the Family Planning Association (FPA) told the High Court.
The FPA's Nathalie Lieven spoke at the case of a Manchester woman Sue Axon, who wants to stop under-16s seeking confidential contraception advice.

Ms Lieven said parents had no right to know if their daughter is pregnant.

Mr Justice Silber, sitting in London, reserved judgment in the case until a later date.

Mrs Axon has told the hearing she regrets a termination she had herself that caused her "guilt, shame and depression".

There is no doubt whatsoever that a child has a right to confidentiality

Nathalie Lieven, FPA
She launched her legal challenge more than a year ago and stressed her two teenage daughters had not sought abortions and that she was bringing the case "as a matter of principle".

It emerged on Thursday her 16-year-old daughter, Joy, is expecting a baby.

The divorced, single mother of five from Baguley, said parents need to know if their children seek abortions so they can advise them in times of crisis.

Current guidelines state terminations can take place without parents' consent and doctors should respect girls' privacy.

Lawyers for Health Secretary Patricia Hewitt are defending the guidelines, saying the right of confidentiality enjoyed by under-16s is crucial in reducing teenage pregnancies and improving sexual health.

'Assertion of rights'

Mrs Axon's QC Philip Havers said the public would find the FPA view on the rights of parents "astonishing".

But Ms Lieven urged the court to dismiss Mrs Axon's application for judicial review, saying: "There is no doubt whatsoever that a child has a right to confidentiality."

She said that a parents' rights "cannot override a child's rights", and that the best interests of the child "are paramount".

"Why then should a child search for help from a doctor in confidence, only to have that overturned by a parents' assertion of rights?," she said.

"How could it possibly be in the best interests of the child?

"How can parental rights trump the right of the child, in that situation, to get the help she needs."

Mr Havers described the FPA submissions as "astonishing".

"I would hazard a guess that the vast majority of people in this country would support the proposition that, in the overwhelming majority of cases, the best judges of a child's welfare are his or her parents," he said.

"I would hazard a guess that the vast majority of people in this country would be astonished to be told that view was out of date and out of step."
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BBC NEWS | UK | England | Manchester | Parents-know-best view 'outdated'


What do you think of this? Do you agree on this?
 
This is a tough one, because there are some young girls out there that do have fear of informing their parents the news of their pregnancy not knowing how their parents would respond to this, etc.. However there are varies of parents out there that do provide their daughter with the support and encouragements, etc...Unplanned pregnancy and abortion are 2 serious issues and a lot of young girls don't know what to do or how they will be able to tell their parents without upsetting them, some would secretly obtaining an abortion or hide their pregnancy from their parents, and kill their newborn baby without anyone finding out who it may belong to, :sigh:, like I said, this is a tough one...IF they feel that a child has a right to confidentiality, how do they really know this would help young girls out there by going through this alone without their parents being involved in this by giving them all the support, the attention and love they needs?..OR do they think a bunch of strangers will make things better for them? instead of their parents?
 
My POV **as for my own blood child**.... (Don't bash me)

I prefer If Teenagers willing open communication w/me... That's fine as long kept open mind.. Today isn't part of old fashioned anymore which it's Modern days as I'm part of this. I do not approve if there abortion early teenagers because their responsible and learn to stop open the legs reason not fun for pleasure.
Therefore "Unplanning have a pregnant"

Honestly, I would be very upset but as long keep support my precouis teenager and will transfered to Adult School program (upgrading class) instead high school. I do not want see student may lead to mocking the pregnant teenager.
Will talk w/Teenager's boyfriend and sort it out w/their parent.. somehow..
To help funds for child support etc etc... If not working out.. then move next step... wait and see...


btw, rest other peoples decison isn't mine.. as far concern issue "Abortion" under parent's RIGHTS control their child. I will disagree w/this!
 
Yes I thought the same, Angel.

Yes I'm agree that therer'e cons and pros...

I see the problem is the teenagers fear to talk open with parents because they know what they are. Perhaps they threaten their teenagers to throw them out of house or whatever... or they heard often that the parents force teenagers to have an abortion or get them to give their baby up for an adoption because the parents dont want to do anything with baby... or support their teenagers which is too much for teenagers over that one mistake. There're many home for mother and child around to help mother and child if teenagers want to keep their baby.

I can see why they fix the law to protect teenagers after collect many problems...

It will be okay if they talk open about sex education etc... then teenagers will know that they are able to trust their parents openly...
 
I feel that if teens are going to act like adults and making decisions without their parents, then they should just have their own place. Because I don't know why parents have to be forced to be a doormat for their teens.

"yes, honey, I will buy you birth control" "yes, honey you can go out all night", or "yes, honey, I will take care of your baby, feed him, change his diaper for you while you go to school", "yes, honey, I will pay $200 for your abortion".
 
My daughters told me everything, and they knows I listen and support them, as I respect their privacy, we work it out together :)
 
I have no interests in being my kid's "best buddy". He gets plenty of that from his friends. I am interested in being his parent. If any of my kids want to act like an adult, then I expect them to work part-time and help me pay some of the stuffs (I would end up using the money to pay for her college...or pay for her baby supplies!) . Because as far as the government is concerned, I have finished raising my kids.

If they want to come to me about their issue, I would listen and give them my advice. If they don't, then they don't. I don't need to know what goes on their life as it is suppose to be none of my business anyhow. I do worry about diseases and heartbreaks from rejections, abortions, diseases, etc result from having sex, but I would confront them and give them "the talk" about how to protect themselves. When the decision is about to be made, they probably remember what I have taught them. It is up to them to listen or not. I do not EVER want to hear that my child had an abortion. Ever. She can tell me she is pregnant if she is going to keep the child though.
 
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nightcrickets said:
I feel that if teens are going to act like adults and making decisions without their parents, then they should just have their own place. Because I don't know why parents have to be forced to be a doormat for their teens.

"yes, honey, I will buy you birth control" "yes, honey you can go out all night", or "yes, honey, I will take care of your baby, feed him, change his diaper for you while you go to school", "yes, honey, I will pay $200 for your abortion".
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So true! No wonder kids are so spoiled these days. That's my opinion...parents are responsible for the children, their wherabouts, and doings so we need to know what's up with them and guide them into solving problems or conflicts.
 
wow, well one thing, parents has every right for their child who are under 18. but one thing, its very cruel for parents rejecting the daughter for being pregnant and also, it is a child's right what to do with the child, not the parents. and as for the baby, good to have for adoption only if a child, not parents decides.
 
Well it is a tough one since I am very pro-choice woman myself and my mom is very profile. I was raped before and I got pregnant before but before I had the chance to have an abortion.. I lost it at 8 weeks. I was only 17 going on 18 years old at the time. My mom still have no idea about this and I am glad that she didn't know about the pregnancy because this is AN unwanted pregnancy to me. And I am not sorry that I lost it because that fetus did not mean so much to me due to the horrible event in my life. If I told my mom about this pregnancy.. I would have been forced to keep and take care of the baby that I do not love and want in the first place.

Today, I am a stronger woman and I am going to teach my daughter about those sexual issues and the abortion issue. If she becomes pregnant, my ex and I agreed to just listen to her and talk to her about it.. and support her choice no matter what decision she makes. We believe that forced adoption, forced to keep the baby or forced abortion is wrong. Yes, we can help her make the right choice for herself and the pregnancy but those choices is totally up to her. We will always be behind our daughter no matter what in life. As long as she know that those choices in life are not very easy and have to be taken seriously.

It is sad that we do not have many open-minded parents that could have helped and guide our children no matter what.
 
nightcrickets said:
I have no interests in being my kid's "best buddy". He gets plenty of that from his friends. I am interested in being his parent. If any of my kids want to act like an adult, then I expect them to work part-time and help me pay some of the stuffs (I would end up using the money to pay for her college...or pay for her baby supplies!) . Because as far as the government is concerned, I have finished raising my kids.
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You has 5 years old son... okay... You will be surprised when your son become teenager...

I disagree to keep teenager from develop into young adult. They will act immaturity teenager if I won't let them develop into young adult. No Way... Let them experiement their new experiences and responsibity young adult. Let them learn what wrong or right... Of course I remind them why I disagree....

I see nothing wrong to see my teenagers as my "best friend" or they see me as their "best friend" when they need my advice and listen their talk... I rather to do that than become over-protective mother and drive them trust someone else or trust wrong peers.

My boys know that they have to obey my rule and show their respect since they live in my house which is good. Its about respect which is a huge matter.
 
FelixKat930,

I understood your point.

Yes, I'm agree with your view how to support our children no matter what. It's their body, we can't force them to keep baby... I positive/suggest my daughter about adoption etc but I will have to accept if my daughter insist for an abortion.
 
Liebling:-))) said:
You has 5 years old son... okay... You will be surprised when your son become teenager...

I disagree to keep teenager from develop into young adult. They will act immaturity teenager if I won't let them develop into young adult. No Way... Let them experiement their new experiences and responsibity young adult. Let them learn what wrong or right... Of course I remind them why I disagree....

I see nothing wrong to see my teenagers as my "best friend" or they see me as their "best friend" when they need my advice and listen their talk... I rather to do that than become over-protective mother and drive them trust someone else or trust wrong peers.

My boys know that they have to obey my rule and show their respect since they live in my house which is good. Its about respect which is a huge matter.
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That's your opinion. I am doing the way my mother raised me, which I will not be surprised because I will become my own mother anyhow. She did not allow us to date, go to dances, or drive a car until after we were 18. So it will become natural for me to do the same thing.
 
nightcrickets said:
I have no interests in being my kid's "best buddy". He gets plenty of that from his friends. I am interested in being his parent....
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True. Kids can find lots of new buddies. But they have only two parents.

While they are children at home, they need parents, not "buddies". They need good role models, and someone who is willing to discipline them. "Buddies" can't do that.

After the children grow up and become responsible adults, then they can become friends with their parents on an equal basis. The training and discipline time is over.
 
Reba said:
True. Kids can find lots of new buddies. But they have only two parents.
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Yes

While they are children at home, they need parents, not "buddies". They need good role models, and someone who is willing to discipline them. "Buddies" can't do that.
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I think you don't understand what I'm talking about. My boys know my hubby & I are their parents who limit them with our form of discipline. They know that they can talk to us anything when they have problems without fear because we are good listener and tried to solve their problems. We want our boys feel comfortable without fear when they trust us with problems... want them see us as "best friend" like what they see their mates "best friend" when they need someone to talk with.

After the children grow up and become responsible adults, then they can become friends with their parents on an equal basis. The training and discipline time is over.
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The teenagers CAN grow up and learn how to cope responsiblity and as responsible young adult only if the parents let them. If not, they will stay immaturity teenagers into immaturity adult.
 
Liebling:-))) said:
The teenagers CAN grow up and learn how to cope responsiblity and as responsible young adult only if the parents let them. If not, they will stay immaturity teenagers into immaturity adult.
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That is absolutely not true. The only immaturity ones I have seen are the ones whose parents try to solve every little problems the child had. I dated a 28 years old guy like this and I have observed how his parents deal with him (he was still living with them). I broke up with him because I felt he was too immature. His parents were not strict either. They spoil him because he had crohn's disease at a young age.

Rising your kids with discipline and rules is totally different.
 
Reba said:
:confused: I was replying to nightcrickets.
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I´m sorry that I didn´t see that nightcricket quoted my post in first place... Occhhh.. I should quote nightcricket´s post before you.
 
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